How to Find Love After 40 – Online

Trying new things and searching for love sounds scary. If you listen to women over 40 providing life experience online you might be scared to death.  You’ve likely seen the horror stories on TikTok.  Today’s dating advice is being offered by me, someone who found love on the internet.  Here are my most important pieces of advice and my story.

At the age of forty, I found myself at a crossroads, starting a new chapter in my life. Divorced, with grown children, and uncertain about finding love again.  Considering I married right out of high school, I had no idea how to date or meet someone. My love life was nonexistent and my dating experience was zero.

Authenticity is crucial when creating an online dating profile. Rather than pretending to be someone you’re not, focus on being your true self. Share insights about your personality, hobbies, and interests. Remember, there’s no need to impress others with a false image. When selecting a photo, choose a recent and clear one that reflects the real you. It may take some trial and error, but finding an honest representation is worth it.

In my case, I wanted to find a partner without younger children. At first, I felt shallow for making this one of my criteria, but I also knew that I had raised my children and was ready to travel more.  It was also important to me that I was connected to people with the same interests as me.

Are you having a hard time? It can be hard to think about the traits of a partner you are looking for.  Try making a vision board. 

Be Patient and take the first date process slowly,  – not like a snail.  Set a process for communicating.  Start small with emails, progress to text, then to talking on the phone and setting a date.  Moving slowly through a process allows you to get to know the person before meeting.  Often true intentions are revealed early.  

Slow does not mean months.  If a potential love interest drags their feet too long this could be a warning sign.  Are they married or not who they say they are, is the common reason for prolonging the process.  Don’t be afraid to Google the person you are communicating with.  Looking up the name online is also a good way to vent if the person is being truthful.  

For the initial meet-up, choose a casual, public setting such as a coffee shop or a cozy café. Meeting at a familiar location can help ease nervousness for both parties. Coffee dates offer the flexibility to continue the conversation over a meal if there’s a connection. Remember to inform a trusted friend or family member about your plans and the person you’ll be meeting, prioritizing your safety.

Remember that the person you’re meeting is also stepping out of their comfort zone. Even if you don’t feel an instant romantic connection, it’s essential to approach the date with kindness and respect. Opting for a coffee date allows for a brief interaction, allowing both parties to gauge compatibility. Be courteous, and attentive, and set clear boundaries, ensuring that your needs are respected.

Only communicate with paid members!  This is the most important piece of advice I give anyone trying to find love after 40 and online!  Why? If someone is not willing to pay a minimum fee to find the love of their life, they are not seriously looking for true love.  Do not put your time and effort into someone unwilling to invest love. I can see someone ready to type, “Not everyone has the money.”  This statement may be true, but if you find yourself complaining your partner is cheap, remember this advice.